Forgive and Forget?

The issue of forgiveness seems to be a hot topic these days. As a self-proclaimed "people pleaser", I have certainly done my share of forgiving in my lifetime. Many health care professionals say that we should forgive others as a gift to ourselves. Their theory is based on the logic that by doing so, we let go of the inner anger we harbor which only serves to eat away at us inside. Okay, I'll buy that. Surely, there are misunderstandings, and people deserve second chances. It is only human to make mistakes.

But what the flip side of this issue? What I find so interesting is that the biggest advocates of the "forgive and forget" motto, are actually the very individuals who require constant forgiveness. These "repeat offenders", manage to consistently justify their own bad behavior by placing blame on the person whom they believe should be more forgiving. What ever happened to taking responsibility for one's own actions?

So, this is what I want to know. How many times are we supposed to forgive the same people over and over again? Is 10, 20, 30 times enough? Or perhaps it should be unlimited. Does that mean we should give the same people a lifetime pass to do whatever they wish over and over again with no consequences? Forgiveness is a gift, not an obligation. It should not be assumed or expected. Most of all, it should never be taken for granted. One never knows when they have been forgiven for the very last time.